Monday, November 19, 2012

Comedy in a Casserole....

Flashback to Thanksgiving, 1993....Jamie and I had been husband and wife for just a few months and we were going to our first married Thanksgiving at his sister's house. His sister asked me to bring a dish to share with everyone and I was so excited to be contributing to the Thanksgiving meal. I was a little nervous because it was our first holiday as a married couple with his family. I decided to bring the staple dish that I had grown up bean casserole with french onions on top. You all know it, you all love it, you've all had it...right?

We got to his sister's house and I proudly walked in with my green bean casserole. I set it on the table, took off the foil, and waited for everyone to dig in. After we said a prayer everyone started to dish up all their food from the table...everything but my casserole that is. So I thought, hmm, why is nobody eating my green bean casserole? This is a favorite at my house, what's up? I was starting to get a little hurt as they walked right by my beans. Whatever...I proudly filled my plate and ate those beans up! However, I was literally the only one! Apparently black people don't like green bean casserole. Who knew!?! Clearly, I didn't.

The hilarious thing is, after that holiday meal, I was given the task of bringing the rolls and soda going forward. Yes, you heard me...rolls and soda....pretty impossible to screw up right? My green bean casserole has been the holiday funny ever since. At first it really did hurt my feelings, but now I can actually look back and laugh. Good thing I have a sense of humor! This was one more thing to adjust to in a mixed race marriage, getting used to each other's traditions, big and small. As time went on I graduated to making complete meals for Jamie's, minus the green bean casserole!

The hilarity continued this year when my sister-in-law Niki called to let me know that the green bean casserole commercials had started and she couldn't wait to make it. I laughed! It truly is the running joke even after all these years. By the way, a little aside, Niki is white. The silliness ensued while later talking to my mom on the phone. She said, while giggling, "Be sure to tell Jamie that Aunt Sal is cooking green bean casserole." Then minutes after that phone call, Jamie's longtime friend Calvin, otherwise known as "Tee," called to wish us an early happy Thanksgiving. Jamie and Tee were comparing menus and Tee listed green bean casserole as one of the dishes he and his wife were making for dinner. Jamie quickly said, "Oh hell no," and just started laughing! He then proceeded to share the casserole story with Tee. Another little funny, Tee just so happens to be black and his wife is white. Do you see a pattern here? I have yet to talk to an all black family that serves the infamous casserole.

The green bean casserole jokes have become another fun tradition that we all share as we continue to embrace the differences between our two very opposite families. Each year we literally have comedy in a casserole! It's the perfect analogy for us. Happy Thanksgiving!


Madgew said...

I love green bean casserole and had no idea that is was for white's only. LOL

Georgie said...

Pure Americana……no matter the race!!! Love it…..and you!! ♥

Jemima said...

I Think that's a wonderful story ..really

Amy Wise said...

Madge, clearly I had no idea either..ha ha ha!! you back!

Jemima...thank you and thank you for stopping by!


Steph D said...

Hello. I just want you to know, I love your blog. I discovered it just two days ago... and I've literally sat and read almost every single post you've made. My husband (black) and I (white) married in April and it's very refreshing to know that we are 'normal'. =) The nicknames, the jokes, and the darn green bean casserole! My dad still will not speak to my husband (we've been together for almost 5 years at this point) - but my mom and grandma are amazing about us. At first they were apprehensive, but they met him once and melted - he's the kind of person that's never known an enemy. Anyways, I just want to thank you - we have rough days that are unique to our situation and it's really lifted me to know there's a place I can go and read we aren't alone.
Your newest biggest fan, Steph

Amy Wise said...


Oh my gosh welcome to my blog. I'm so glad you found it and now feel you have a place to go where you can relate. I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. I dealt with that for many years with Jamie's family. My family has been accepting of Jamie from day one but Jamie's side of the fam was not happy with me at all. Now however it's a whole different story. We all love each other very much. It took years but we got there. If Jamie and I had let each other go every single time someone said we shouldn't be together we wouldn't have made it past the first date! =) Follow your heart and eventually people will see your hubby for his heart and not his skin color. If they choose not to it is sadly their loss. They will be missing out on what sounds like a wonderful human being. I wish you two as many years as we have had. I wouldn't change our crazy life for anything. It's all worth me. I hope you come back often and if you EVER need anything always feel free to ask. We have been there done that and then some. Here's to LOVE!!!!


Amy did you find my blog? I always like to ask. =)

Steph D said...

How did I find your blog? Good question! Actually, I was so upset about that church in Kentucky (did you hear about that?), that I was just Google searching around for something more positive to get that 'taste out of my mouth'! And the first post about green bean casserole grabbed my attention because we had the exact same conversation last week!

Hamlin said...

Thanks for sharing such a nice post..Keeping a marriage full of contentment and love is easier than what most people think. One important factor to a happy marriage life is communication. Always make sure that you talk to your wife about matters that you don't both agree on. There's always what we call compromise. Chances of misunderstandings that may lead to fights will be lessened if you know how and when to listen and to talk.

Amy Wise said...


Thank you. Good advice!


Monika said...

Kudos to your sense of humor!

Amy Wise said...


Thanks so much for stopping by! It took me a minute but now this story literally cracks me up! Both sides of the family make jokes about it throughout the year. The green bean jokes have become as much of a tradition as the casserole itself!

Hugs to you Monika!

foreveryoung said...

You are going to love this story! I saw you say that you like to know how people find your blog, so I will tell you. Lat night at a ladies' bible study we were discussing making frozen casseroles for families at church who have an emergency arise. My black friend looked at me and sweetly said, "Black people don't make casseroles." That was news to me! So today I googled "why don't black people make casseroles" and your blog post was about the third result! My daughter is in a cross cultural marriage with a wonderful African man and I will send her to your blog as well.

Amy Wise said...


I love it!!!! Thank you so much for sharing your experience with me!

This is one of my favorite stories regarding the differences in our marriage. It comes up every single holiday season and we continuously get a good laugh about it!

Thanks so much for stopping by!

Amy Wise

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