Friday, October 16, 2009
The picture above was taken at a wedding we went to this past weekend. The significance of the picture and the wedding is pretty amazing considering today's post. Because I write a blog about interracial marriage I pay a lot of attention to things that are going on in regards to interracial relationships and race in general. However, somehow I missed this latest story until it showed up in my inbox from a friend of mine who is also in an interracial marriage. She is Hispanic and her Hubby is black. But first, back to the picture. The wedding that we went to in the picture was also for a mixed race couple. She is white and he is Hispanic. The wedding, and the day, was about a beautiful couple, getting married in a beautiful location, creating a beautiful family. The end. It wasn't about what race they are, it was just about love. Now, back to today's post. Sorry I'm all over the place today, but I think I'm in such shock, and the relevance of an interracial wedding is so ironic, that you will quickly get the picture.
The article below is about an interracial couple in Louisiana who went to apply for a marriage license. When the Justice of the Peace found out they were a mixed race couple he denied the license!!! Yes, you heard me.....denied!!! This is some of what he said....
Keith Bardwell, justice of the peace in Tangipahoa Parish, says, "It is his experience that most interracial marriages do not last long." Bardwell said he asks everyone who calls about marriage if they are a mixed race couple. If they are, he does not marry them, he said. Bardwell said he has discussed the topic with blacks and whites, along with witnessing some interracial marriages. He came to the conclusion that most of black society does not readily accept offspring of such relationships, and neither does white society, he said. "There is a problem with both groups accepting a child from such a marriage," Bardwell said. "I think those children suffer and I won't help put them through it."
Excuse me!!!???? Interracial marriages don't last that long??? The children suffer!!!?? Last I checked I have been married to my husband for 16 years and we are stronger than ever! He is my best friend and the love of my life! Did I not just recently write a post about "The Children" and how amazing it is to have such a diverse background? How embracing all of who you are makes you such a fabulous well rounded person? If that's suffering, well then bring it on! Um, isn't the President of the United States a "mixed race child?" Too bad he had such low aspirations and ended up doing nothing with his life! =) I wonder how he feels about this decision? Last I checked denying a marriage license based on race was outlawed in 1967....why is this man still allowed to marry people? Why isn't he in jail? He is breaking the law based on personal opinion. I'm sorry, how is that legal? I can't stop shaking my head, and have yet to pick my jaw up off the floor because I seriously can't believe this happened in 2009!!! It's one thing to be ignorant and we all know racism is out there, but THIS!!!? Ohhhh heck no! Not acceptable. Discrimination at it's worst. Okay I have ranted enough......soooo Mr. Keith Bardwell, so called Justice of the "Peace," first of all, you should not be allowed to use the word "peace" in your title, you are creating hate not peace. Second of all, next time maybe you should do a little research on interracial couples and you will find that we are all quite happy in our marriages! We might have to go through some things that most people in same race marriages don't, but the reason we have to go through these "things" is because of people like YOU who just keep the madness of racism alive. We are just couples, no different than anyone else. Me personally, I feel sorry for you that you haven't allowed yourself to experience the joy of marrying EVERYONE who is in love. Love doesn't discriminate, maybe you shouldn't either.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Out to dinner with family and friends in '08
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Always be aware of your surroundings......this is something that Jamie has ingrained in my brain since the day we met. He says that no matter what neighborhood you live in or where you are, you are subject for a "jacking" at any moment if you don't pay attention to what is around you. This thought process comes from years of experience and growing up in the "hood" (as he says). He and I grew up in totally different types of neighborhoods which gave us very different perspectives on what goes on around us. I "loosely" paid attention to his advice, and then one day, low and behold, I was the one who got "jacked." I was grocery shopping on a Sunday afternoon in our old neighborhood. As I was coming out of the grocery store I did look around, but as usual didn't pay a ton of attention to what was going on around me. I was standing at the back of my car loading my groceries and all of the sudden a young black man was standing next to me. He was so close that I figured he must know me to be acting soooo familiar. I looked at him to see if I recognized him as one of Jamie's friends. He looked really young so I thought maybe he was one of my nephew's friends. I just kept thinking, he must know me because he is so close to me that our hips are touching. Never, ever did it cross my mind that something really bad was about to go down. Clearly, I trust too easily. Mind you, this is all happening in a matter of minutes. Finally when I realized I didn't know who he was, I looked at the young "man" and said, "Can I help you?" He then lifted his jacket and pulled out a gun and said, "See this, don't move, and don't say a word, where is your purse?" I just stood there in shock thinking this can't be happening! I thought for a second and then said, "It's in the front seat." It wasn't, but I just needed him to get away from me, so I could have a minute to breathe. He then said again, "Don't move and don't say a word, while his eyes were "bulging" out of his head." He was not playing! All the while people are coming and going having know idea what was happening right in front of their eyes. When he didn't find the purse in the front seat he started getting very upset. He said, "Where is it, where is it?!" I could see he was losing it, and realized I just needed to give it to him or he might shoot me. I told him it was right by me and he grabbed it and said, "Don't you say anything!" Then off he ran to a waiting car. I just stood their for a second and then just started to cry and yelled, "Someone call 911!" A car pulled up to me that had seen the guy running and asked if I had just been robbed. I said, "Yes! Call the police!" I think the thought of a gun being involved and what could have happened just shook me to my core because I was just in shock. The police arrived and amazingly enough it was the SAME cop that told me at the infamous "Toys "R" Us arrest" themanyshadesoflove.blogspot.com/2009/07/false-arrest.html that "I would be on the ground with my husband if I didn't shut up." Really? What are the odds that of all the cops he would be the one to show up to "my robbery!?" So he took my statement, as I stood there shaking, and then I said, "Do you remember me?" Of course he didn't, so I quickly refreshed his memory. He said, "We were just doing our job that day." Yeah, whatever. I was too upset at what just happened to also re-live that terrible day. After that I went home and when I walked in the door I just started to cry. Jamie said, "What's wrong!?" I told him what happened and he was soooo MAD he was ready to go find the guy and "kill" him. Okay not literally, but let's just say it would not have been pretty if he had found him. Needless to say the guy was long gone. After that, for an entire year I was too freaked out to go to the grocery store. It was the weirdest thing. But the worst thing that came out of this was I kept thinking I was going to run into him again, or that he would come back and rob me again because he had all my information about where I lived. I would see a young black man that resembled him and literally start to shake. How awful is that? Afraid of young black men and I am married to a black man! It was a horrible feeling. These are the things that create the hateful stereotypes that I am so against, and this time I was the one living it! I felt guilty because of the fear and I felt anger because of what he "created" in my life. Over time I got over it and realized that my purse was probably in a dumpster somewhere and I was the last person on this young "man's" mind. I am sure karma has caught up with him and I hope with all my heart that he has changed, but I can guarantee he has no idea that what he did that day changed my life forever. One thing is for certain, you can be sure that I am now very aware of my surroundings even in my "safe" little neighborhood.