Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Build Your Life!

Lately I’ve seen question after question on various interracial websites about what couples should do when family members don’t accept their interracial relationship. My answer to this is…..don’t be afraid to build a life together because you’re worried about what other people think of your relationship. Jamie and I never would have made it past dating had we listened to everyone else’s opinions about us. Here we are 19 years later, with a beautiful daughter and an amazing life!

I’m so disturbed about some of the stories I’ve seen in the news or heard from friends lately, that sometimes I feel like we are actually moving backwards when it comes to race relations. Just the other day there was a story on the news about a man who had his daughter sign a contract that stated she would not date any black men, felons, or gangsters, and if she did he would kill them. Kill them?! Really!? First of all, the fact that he lumped black men in the same category as felons and gangsters, like ALL black men fall into these categories, is stereotyping at its worst. The contract itself was twisted enough, but when the daughter actually ended up dating a black man, her father posted dead or alive posters with the boyfriend’s information and picture on them! Well, karma is a “you know what,” and Daddy is now in prison for 7 years! Clearly this is an extreme case of racial family issues, but I hear time and time again of families that will automatically disown their children if they date outside their race. How do you disown your own child? Better yet, why would you want to? Disowning someone because of the skin color of the person they love? Seriously? Why? Does this “skin color” beat your child? Does this “skin color” treat your child horribly? Or does this “skin color” love your child with all “its” heart? Last time I checked skin color doesn’t hurt people, people do.

Jamie and I have lived through it all when it comes to racism, and there were days, when trust me, I didn’t think the tears would stop because of some of the racial issues we had to deal with, but now, here we are, happier, stronger and more in love than ever. We love us, we love our life and we wouldn’t have it any other way. We never allowed circumstances or people to divide us or destroy our love. In fact, just the opposite, our strength comes from all we have had to deal with throughout the years and at this point we are Mr. and Mrs. Universe we are so freakin’ strong!  Nothing and no one can come between us….ever!

Now, back to YOU…..whatever you do….don’t be afraid to build YOUR life! Go….now….start today. Here’s to your future and here’s to your love….today, tomorrow and forever!


Anonymous said...

Knowing your family as I do this is a love match and it does get stronger and stronger. Love you all.

Amy Wise said...

Thank you so much Madge. The three of us are so blessed to be a family and as crazy as we are I wouldn't have it any other way! I'm so glad you are a part of our lives. Love you back! A.

Georgie said...

How beautiful the world would be if we all just "loved"…..that's it….just "loved"!!!!!!! Thank you Amy, Jaime and your lovely Tatiana, for being such a perfect example of what it means to do just that….love!!! oxoxoxoxo

Amy Wise said...

Oh Georgie you are sweet to say that! I hope our "life" helps other's see that you can just love and build a beautiful life, even when it's not easy. Hugs and love sent to you Georgie girl! Love A.

Nay K. said...

Amy, if you not learned by now that All (not some) but All Blacks/African Americans are either lazy, on welfare, medi-cal, ssi, shiftless, liars, gang members, in local jails, girlfriend/wife beaters, rapist, kidnappers, shoplifters, burglars, alcoholics, heavy drug users or in prison and race mixing between Blacks and Whites and Blacks and other races will cause the off springs to be born mentally mixed up and deformed. Yeah, he's right, he don’t want his daughter marrying anyone like that. Then you better wake up young woman and smell the stuff that racists still think in this country.

Oh never mind those so call African American/Blacks that are doctors, lawyers, judges, police officers, chiefs, fire fighters, military soldiers (Gen. Colin Powell) (that went to war and did not) teachers, mayors, inventors, famous and semi famous actors, actresses (Angela Bassett, Sidney Poitier, Denzel Washington, Cicely Tyson), writers, singers, dancers, pro sports heroes (Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant), t.v news reporters (Richelle Carey, Pat Harvey, Jim Hill), famous and semi famous ministers(T.D Jakes, Creflo Dollar) and oh some guy that is half Black that we call the president of these United States. None of those types count for a cute White girl to marry and have kids with.

Amy Wise said...

Nay K.,

Oh I know that the world is still full of racism. One day I won't even need to write this blog because we will just BE. Won't that be nice!? =) The man that had his daughter sign the contract wasn't white he was hispanic, but that is neither here nor there...racism is racism no matter what race it comes from. We just have to keep teaching about love and hopefully one day ignorance and hate won't be part of our every day lives. One day.

Hugs and love to your fam!

Nay K. said...

Oops, My stupid error on misjudging on the race card. But since he is Hispanic, then let me go on the record to say that he must Not be from such wonderful Latin countries as Brazil, Colombia, Panama, Puerto Rico, and Dominican Republic because those countries, oops, I forgot Cuba, but all of these Latin countries have Black/dark skin Latinos and racism does Not exist there. Dark skin Latinos are marryed to Light or White skin Latinos.

My wife and her family are from Latin Central America and most of her family are very light skin Hispanics and they have some dark skin latinos in their family and they are NOT racist at all, other wise, they would not have allowed me to marry Ester or Ester would have been prejudice and racist herself. Thank the Holy Spirit of God that she and he family are not.

Not wanting to mention any Latin countries, but he must be from a Latin country that is a few hours away from California.

Because in the 80's and 90's, I use to hear that same type of racist comments about marrying Blacks from a certain group of Hispanics. End of story.

Amy Wise said...

Nay K.

Sadly racism exists everywhere. I don't ever want to say one specific country is more racist then the next, because that just creates more stereotyping. No race, country, age, or religion is immune. It's how people are raised and what they are exposed to...those are things that can happen anywhere. The race of the man that created this contract is irrelevant...racism is racism no matter who it comes from.

Hope you are well. Hugs to your beautiful family!