Friday, September 3, 2010

Love Is Not A Skin Color.......(My Latest Story on TheNextFamily.com)

Okay I’m officially irritated. If it wasn’t so ridiculous I would probably be mad too. It’s amazing how you can find out how people really feel when they voice their opinions behind your back to someone else. Are we in high school?! Funny thing is, more often than not, those opinions come full circle and make their way back to the very person you didn’t have the courage to say it to in the first place. So where am I going with all this, and what happened that got me so hot and bothered (and not in a good way)?

Well, we have a “friend” who shall remain nameless to protect the ignorant, that apparently has huge issues with black men being with white women. This is someone who has been in our home, drank our wine, ate our food, laughed with us and cried with us…but come to find out she doesn’t approve of black men with white women?! How do we now know this? The other day she was at a friend’s party and there was another black and white couple attending the party as well. These are the lovely words that came out of her mouth: “He is obviously not a real man, because if he was he would get himself a strong black woman and wouldn’t be with that weak white woman.” Ummm, excuse me?! Wow. WOW! Of course this comment got back to my husband and he said, “Well, then what does she really think of Amy and me?” Ya, my thoughts exactly.

First of all, since when are all black women strong and all white women weak? I am probably one of the strongest people you will ever meet. Seriously, I’ve been through it and I’m still standing and still strong, and look…I’m white! Why do people insist on continuing this separation madness? There are strong black women and weak black women, there are strong white women and weak white women. Being strong or being weak has nothing to do with skin color…it’s a mind-set, and last I checked all of our brains were the same color. Maybe next time she should use hers before speaking. Just a thought. It’s sad to me that people just don’t get it. I’m not with Jamie because he’s black and he’s not with me because I’m white. We are with each other because we love each other…period. Love comes from the heart, which, just like the brain, is the same color in all of us. It’s simple…love is not a skin color!

4 comments:

Roschelle said...

great post!

there's seriously something wrong with the mindset of people who choose to continue to perpetuate exclusionary practices and ideas.

i'm glad you were made privy to her true feelings.

i loathe pretentious people

Amy said...

Roschelle,

Thanks so much I appreciate it. I run into this issue so much it just drives me crazy. It's insane to me that people think couples that are mixed race are together because of the color of their skin. If someone gets together soley because of that, it will last a hot minute. Lives are built...and they aren't built on skin color...they are built on trust, love, honesty, faith, hard work and so much more! People are silly if they think it's any other way. Thanks for reading and commenting!

Have a beautiful weekend!

Amy

Anonymous said...

Amy,
I'm so sorry to hear this about your "friend". I know you and your family had to be hurt very deeply by her comments when this person was so close to you. If you don't mind sharing, I am really curious about how long you were friends with this person and how she came to be what you thought was such a good friend. If you don't want to share that at all, I understand, being that it is very personal. Or if you do feel comfortable sharing that info, please email me with more details, if they might give up her identity on this blog.
I am very curious, because it boggles my mind how this racist indivual was able to hide her TRUE feelings for so long and ingratiate herself into your home and personal lives to the degree that she did. What an imposter! I feel for you and I know you all must feel so betrayed. I have been hurt by friends and by former partners, but I can't imagine the hurt this has caused you because it comes out of so much ignorance! My heart goes out to you and yours.
Heather

Amy said...

Heather,

Thank you for your concern. To be honest I think her issues stem from her problems with men. She is not happy with herself and her relationships, so she feels the need to make comments about those that are happy. Her comments clearly come from a place of insecurity. There are a lot of women that feel the need to bring others down when they are down.
Right now she is one of those women. I'm all about bringing each other up no matter what! Hopefully one day she will be too. I truly wish her only the best.

I will email you details.

Amy